Western culture has spent the last fifty years empowering women, while denigrating, disrespecting, and demeaning men. The consequence? I wrote about that consequence in, Where did all the good men go?, detailing the reasons why men have quit marriage. Now, its the ladies turn.
But, its not that they are on strike from marriage, but why men aren't finding good women to marry.
Men used to feel like kings of their castles. Now, they work all day only to come home, make dinner, do dishes, be treated like hired help; being berated by a wife for not doing good enough. Why would men sign up for this? I don't blame men for going on strike from marriage. The pickings are not very good!
I have come up with a list of practical examples that sets women apart from one another. Following psychologist Helen Smith, I am aim to communicate what the men are thinking. They want a good woman to marry; without the aggressive â€œtough-girlâ€ baggage.
Good Women...don't compete with their men
Dr. Helen Smith has been researching this the effects of matriarchy for years. One man she interviewed left college saying, â€œManliness wants to compete, to win, to boast, to glory, even to fail honorably against the best. This is disallowed to men on campus.â€ Men do not want to compete with their women. They don't want to fight over who is head of the house. They don't want to be in competition over who brings home a bigger paycheck. They don't want to compete with a woman who has a career. In 1960, only 31% of married women worked outside of the home. That figured doubled to 62% by 1997. Men want their women home taking care of and managing the affairs of the household.
Good Women...support men being men
There is no such thing as equality. Generally speaking, women get to have shopping sprees and girl time, but men are banned from doing things they want to do. Dr. Smith asked her audience and they responded. When men were single, they could hang out with friends and do guy things. After getting married, they go shopping with their wife, holding her purse or babysitting the kids, just so she can have a good time. Men need their time and space just like women do. Yet Scripture teaches that woman was made for man, not the other way around.
Good Women...Truly Love
Two things that Dr. Smith cites as the causes for men going on strike is emotional rejection and monetary hurt. Men's emotions are being ignored. But men pouring themselves to make relationships work out, only to have their women cheat on them or be dissatisfied ,wrecks havoc on their emotions. Apart from what some may think, men do have emotions when it comes to sex. Women who rarely give in sexually with their husbands are good women to them. Love is selfless and even when we don't want to have sex, we need to be available to our husbands. It is not â€œmy body, my choice.â€ Good women care about the well being of their husbands and families over and above any career.
â€œAmerican women are feminists at heart.â€ a man said on Dr. Helen's blog. The question is not, â€œAre you a feminist,â€ but, â€œhow much has feminism affected you?â€ The feminist rhetoric has infiltrated our thinking and has permeated society, but this is one way we can fight back for happy men, happy women, and happy marriages.
For Further Discussion:
Tim Challies on Fierce WomenÂ
Disciple's Perspective aims to reunite gentlemanly virtues with scholarly conversation. Standing in the great Reformed and conservative heritage of thinkers like Edmund Burke and Abraham Kuyper, we humbly seek to inject civility into an informed conversation, one article at a time, bringing clarity out of chaos.Â
For Further Discussion:Â
Thomas Sowell onÂ â€œThe 'Diversity' Fraudâ€Â
The Reformed ConservativeÂ aims to reunite gentlemanly virtues with scholarly conversation. Standing in the great Reformed and conservative heritage of thinkers like Edmund Burke and Abraham Kuyper, we humbly seek to inject civility into an informed conversation, one article at a time, bringing clarity out of chaos.Â